Sometimes, the dreams we hold dear are not the ones we are meant to live. They are merely stepping stones to something even greater, something beyond our wildest imagination… I read this profound message in one of the weekly newsletters sent by one of my mentors.

And it instantly took me back on my own journey. For two decades, I pursued a dream that wasn’t meant for me, shaping my career choices around it. Letting it go was challenging, given the substantial investment of time and money that I had put into it. 

Society’s influence led me to conform to a path that was not my destiny. The question choice I had for me was “Do I want to live a life that was written for me?” or, “Do I want to live a life that’s written by me?”

Faced with a crucial decision in my late 30s, I decided to choose the latter. I accepted the fact that I needed to move on to something new. This new had already shown up in my life, but in a very vague manner. Embracing uncertainty, I reinvented myself. It was daunting to abandon the familiar, reset ambitions, and trust a vague, new path. Yet, I took the leap rather than regret it later!

I’m not saying that your journey has to be the same as mine. When it comes to our lives, each year, we try to renew ourselves. As an annual tradition, new goals are set through new year resolutions. Every year, we make ritualistic resolutions about our relationships, our health, our finances, and our careers. 

Studies show that over 90% of New Year’s resolutions fail every year. In most cases, our resolutions are shaped by our parents, communities, education systems, media, and movies. Every year, we reset and renew our resolutions blindly. But, to achieve true success and lasting change, it is important to understand how cultural conditioning can influence your mindset and beliefs and be prepared to challenge those that do not align with your beliefs and dreams. 

So, how will you make 2024 different from all your previous years?

Don’t Make Resolutions; Create a Long-range Vision

Because resolutions are merely society-driven rituals, we fail to adhere to them, despite our best intentions. We hope, however, that we will finally be able to keep our resolutions this time. Only to find ourselves blaming time, motivation, or lack of zeal for not following through. So, stop making resolutions. 

When Sir Richard Branson first dreamt about space tourism and Virgin Galactic, back in the early 2000s, he certainly did not make a New Year’s resolution. Or, when Sachin Tendulkar decided that he would play cricket for India after watching the 1983 World Cup victory, I am pretty sure he wasn’t planning on making a resolution. Fast forward to 2011, Sachin was finally able to achieve his dream of lifting the ICC Cricket World Cup. Fast forward to 2021, Sir Branson was finally able to see a glimpse of the reality of his dream when he onboarded the first-ever test flight into outer space.

In an interview, American Investing Genius Warren Buffett once shared, “Every year undergraduate students from 40 universities visit me. If they absorb Mrs. B’s lessons, they need none from me.” Mrs. B, referred to by Buffett, is Rose Blumkin, the founder of Nebraska Furniture Mart. An immigrant from Russia, she started the furniture company with a US$500 loan from her brother and her paltry savings. By the early ’80s, it became the largest US furniture retailer. In a one-page deal, Buffett acquired a 90% stake for $55 million in 1983, not for the furniture business, but for Mrs. B’s vision.
Dreams take time to materialize, and the only way to achieve them is by creating a vision. And that too, a really long-range vision. If you do a Google search, you might find several definitions of vision. Some might call it “moonshot” goals. Others might refer to them as BHAGs (Big Hairy Audacious Goals). Some others might call it a way to answer your own “whys” of life.  For me, creating a vision is a journey of play and possibilities. Much like how I am playing it today being a life coach. It’s much more than knowing your whys and your reasons. It not just defines where you are going, but also describes the world you hope to live in and commit to helping build. Consider your vision as a vast jigsaw puzzle, uniquely yours. It might encompass mountains, open skies, flowing rivers, the adventures of life, communal living, and collaborative societies working towards advancing humanity—tailored to your preferences. This idealistic, inclusive, patient, and resilient puzzle becomes the essence of your vision. Crucially, this vision sets the context and tone for your goals. Goals, then, are the specific pieces of the puzzle, not the puzzle itself. Aligned with your overarching vision, these finite goals offer a sense of accomplishment, progress, and the thrill of winning. Meanwhile, the enduring vision provides the inspiration needed to persevere daily. Just as each puzzle piece contributes to the whole, goals contribute to the realization of your grand, long-term vision.

Stop Being Reactive; Nurture Being Adaptive

With our world seeing global depressions, economic recessions, wars, technology bubble bursts, and even pandemics like the recent COVID-19 pandemic, we have become highly reactive in our lives. Just take a moment and notice your day-to-day interactions. How often are you being reactive? Let’s take an example. You step on the scale one day and react to the number it displays. As a result of an impulse decision, you decide that you must slim down. And how often do you really follow up with it? Your reaction was normal to an unsettling stimulus. But, as we learn to nurture a long-range vision, a key skill that we need to build is to develop a sense of adaptability to changes. 

Sachin Tendulkar had to adapt throughout his cricketing dream that spanned over two decades. Had Sir Richard Branson been reactive to his dream of space tourism, he probably would have given up in a couple of years. Nebraska Furniture Mart was started by a woman in her mid-40s, a few years after the great depression of 1929 when the average life expectancy was just about 55 years. Mrs. B went on to become a retail legend over the next four-plus decades.

Being adaptable helps us to shift our mindset away from the idea that we can change our lives overnight.

Eicher Motors’ CEO, Siddhartha Lal, faced a pivotal decision upon joining the company with 15 underperforming business units. Driven by a long-range vision and passion, he opted to divest 13 and focus on motorcycles and trucks. Today, Royal Enfield, a result of his strategic choices and adaptability, is a globally recognized motorcycle brand. Even during the COVID-19 pandemic, when Lal faced opposition from Eicher shareholders, the Royal Enfield employees union publicly supported his re-appointment, citing his positive impact on the company and its employees.

When it comes to being adaptable, you will fail a few times. Not every decision will go your way. People may ridicule you. You may even hit a temporary slump. Yet, over the long run, you will be better equipped to face challenges and change with the times. You will be anchored in your long-range vision, fully knowing that the ways to get there can change over time. You will be better able to handle transitions, bounce back more quickly from adversity, and ultimately, be happier and more satisfied with your life. 

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So, will 2024 be your year to create lasting changes? I will be cheering for you on the other side!